[Mean Mr Mustard]

Pasted from my intro post -

Hello. My name is Mean Mr Mustard, and I´m here for the benefits of Group Therapy... Especially Word Association games.

My later life crisis self-medication has just started as a deposit and payment for a 2010 90k miles SWB XJ Prem Lux. Due delivery on Friday. As part of my buyers homework, (including lurking here) I bought the 2010 catalogue and price list - best evilbay bargain ever. The first owner blew half of what I´m paying for this on factory upgrades, so it´s actually 95%+ Portfolio, then with further speccing. The longest ever tick list the Castle Bromwich foreman ever saw. Only lacking the seat massage / cooling, dual view screen, and those nice embossed Leapers on the headrests.

Bowers & Wilkins 1350
Satin Walnut trim 200
Ivory leather 1385
Kasuga Alloys 1000 (!)
Space saver spare 125
Rear parking camera 400

Portfolio options:
Heated wood steering wheel 350
Privacy glass 250

£5060 Loose change for the first owner... Or... did they know exactly what they were doing by deleting the cooling/massage seats, and the screen, as superfluous gimmicks, then rebuilding and adding to the spec? Maybe that owner traded in for a newer XJ, and is reading this, pining for the B&W CD player?

 

[#steve]

According to my brochure there is a 7k price difference between a Premium Luxury and a Portfolio XJ.
So the first owner has saved himself 2k by picking the options he wanted!

I think I would have just gone for a Portfolio as options seem to count for nothing come trade in time.

By the way you need to post some photos of your XJ as we're all nosey here.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

So the first owner has saved himself 2k by picking the options he wanted!

You must be the Previous Owner, and I claim my £5.

Pics? But they all look the same! OK, pics when (if) it arrives, courtesy of the Motor Trade and some geezer with a flatbed.

So excited I can barely contain myself. Well, not really. Thinking of all the many things that could go wrong thanks to the reinforcing doom loop we have here. It's only confirmation bias... It's just a pity 'Nothing Went Wrong With My Jag This Month' would be a really boring, if reassuring thread.

Talking of threads, I shall be getting them wheelnuts replaced tout suite.

 

[Fraser]

So the first owner has saved himself 2k by picking the options he wanted!

You must be the Previous Owner, and I claim my £5.

Pics? But they all look the same! OK, pics when (if) it arrives, courtesy of the Motor Trade and some geezer with a flatbed.

So excited I can barely contain myself. Well, not really. Thinking of all the many things that could go wrong thanks to the reinforcing doom loop we have here. It's only confirmation bias... It's just a pity 'Nothing Went Wrong With My Jag This Month' would be a really boring, if reassuring thread.

Talking of threads, I shall be getting them wheelnuts replaced tout suite.

Well, nothing went wrong with my Jaguar last month, or, indeed, any month since I bought it in January 2019. (May 2017 model)

 

[mac_doctor]

At least pictures will tell us the colour!

All first owner's have strange behaviour: I am not convinced that they are ever driven by money: The trim level is just a starting point. Starting with a Premium Luxury you can get (very nearly) to Portfolio, but starting with a Portfolio you can spec it nearly to Autobiography level, just ask Jim (he'll be along soon).

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

At least pictures will tell us the colour!

It's black. Aren't they all? Luckily, non-metallic, not the metallic which it was described as. This makes fixing the gash on the nose (possibly relating to a documented windscreen replacement) that much easier with filler and Halford's rattle cans - the previous owner's attempt was / is a bodge.

 

[mac_doctor]

At least pictures will tell us the colour!

It's black. Aren't they all? Luckily, non-metallic, not the metallic which it was described as. This makes fixing the gash on the nose (possibly relating to a documented windscreen replacement) that much easier with filler and Halford's rattle cans - the previous owner's attempt was / is a bodge.

Inside? Ivory?

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Oh yes. Lovely upgraded ivory for only 1385 when new. The Kasuga difference is the one that gets me...

Anyway, I feel the need for lots of safety and preventives... planning based on what I've read here and elsewhere.

Immediately following ramp inspection at independent garage - confirmation that the MOT just issued is reliable and I don't have a death trap...

New brake discs and pads (thinking Brembos)
New wheel bolts
Front and rear dashcams hardwired into dash and rear seat fuse boxes

Then to the Jaguar independent -
All three engine belts
Water Pump, latest more reliable version
gearbox oil
power steering oil
DPF checking
Any possible other failure points, such as cheap plastic parts, clips etc If anyone has particular recommendations on these minor but critical items, be grateful to know - read them here and there, but didn't note at the time.

Rear tyres are half worn, so decent brand - all four - in the spring, with an aftermarket TPMS box added if the car doesn't already have one, to help keep them good. And tracking check to go with that.

 

[MrKis]

Has it had new plastic intake manifolds at some point?

 

[JimC64]

Oh yes. Lovely upgraded ivory for only 1385 when new. The Kasuga difference is the one that gets me...

Anyway, I feel the need for lots of safety and preventives... planning based on what I've read here and elsewhere.

Immediately following ramp inspection at independent garage - confirmation that the MOT just issued is reliable and I don't have a death trap...

New brake discs and pads (thinking Brembos)
New wheel bolts
Front and rear dashcams hardwired into dash and rear seat fuse boxes

Then to the Jaguar independent -
All three engine belts
Water Pump, latest more reliable version
gearbox oil
power steering oil
DPF checking
Any possible other failure points, such as cheap plastic parts, clips etc If anyone has particular recommendations on these minor but critical items, be grateful to know - read them here and there, but didn't note at the time.

Rear tyres are half worn, so decent brand - all four - in the spring, with an aftermarket TPMS box added if the car doesn't already have one, to help keep them good. And tracking check to go with that.

Congrats and welcome aboard

Sounds good MMM, sounds like you're switched on too

Might be an idea to consider checking the sunroof for rust ( I'm sure you're probably aware?! ) Also possibly consider removing Throttle body and giving a good clean as well as the MAP sensor, chances are they'll be more than a little coked up

Looking forward to reading how you get on and pics when you can

Jim

 

[mac_doctor]

You will likely spend some time and/ or money on replacing the door motors, too.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Saw the horror story early model sunroof runners. Eeek. What were they thinking? Maybe saving a few quid, having blown loads on the sumptuous Bowers & Wilkin? Consequently noted on the long checklist, which I will share here later for other's benefit. Maybe we could collectively work that up as a sticky pdf or something? My sunroof runners - at least the visible part - do have slight surface rust, so I've got myself some Hammerite rust treatment and their usual black smooth paint - and will cover the leather before starting... Not yet got the tub of vaseline. That'll do, until I can get the indy to remove the rear glass per Topix, and we can have a looky see there too, and poke the Spanish guitar string or strimmer wire down the drainage holes. It had that drainage problem on the fuel filler, now fixed. Hopefully little or no rainwater ingress into the tank.

The big test - and one which failed on a previous car, was a diesel infested sump, indicating DPF regen failures. Lacking a dipstick, or oil dilution warning, the canny method demonstrated by my friend is to open the oil filler cap, and do the funky sniff test for diesel. Which I shall now do monthly, while also noting 'oil' volume on the readout - and also avoid town runabout bimbles. People, it was an outwardly gorgeous Portfolio L. My good friend - who had toiled long and hard on Chieftain tanks in his youth, and had also read the common XJ engines failures thread here, https://www.jaguarforum.com/threads/3-0-diesel-engine-common-fatal-fault.105348/ was already very familiar indeed with very woeful big engines (Leyland L60) and quietly advised walking away, which was exactly why he was there (though I did get the test drive to know for sure I really needed an XJ in my life). Probably didn't help with regens.

Cracked manifolds, I am advised by the Jag indy, are about the worst potential expense, at £1200. Thanks for the Throttle and MAP sensor advice., Jim. Perhaps we can pull together sticky guides to checking a prospective engine as far as possible, and then proactively putting a used motor right, given time and modest money? With guide prices so people know what they are getting into? To me, it seems better to have an older one, depreciation done, and then allow latitude for the essential maintenance rather than blowing it all on the newer shiny article and hoping for the best, with no homework done at all. (Wot, no CD player..?) Not my style. This is a classic to be nurtured and savoured, not run into the ground.

The shocking wheelnuts issue did pass me by, thus not known at inspection. That one should have been, or especially by now, subject to mandatory recall. Are wheelnuts even checked on an MOT?

Are your nuts swelling.

Do you have to force a socket on to your wheel nuts? As some have had problems with nuts sheering I thought I'd get mine changed before that happened. These are what I purchased, the difference being they are solid. These are the old OEM Jaguar ones. The chromed outer is a pressed on cover...

www.jaguarforum.com

Cheap enough to rectify though - but then you have to really really need to know what you are about. It's a vital safety thing, with potential dire consequences, especially for a high performance car - and, if next Tuesday, my trusted man with the ramp condemns them, then I shall definitely leave it with him until we can replace them. And the spec has to be spot on - or hopefully improved from that dire state. Some might think it's trivial, but that is a major stress point - I'm reminded of the aircraft fitter who fixed slightly different bolts to a canopy frame of an airliner... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Airways_Flight_5390

Given my first owner specced everything then some, I hope he (or she) specified TPMS too. A mere £400 would have been nothing to an evil capitalist Hedge Fund trader or such personage with £60k + to spend. As for me at that time, among the Lower Orders, but still vastly privileged to be buying a quality new car too (circa £17000) for a mere £100, the Octavia TPM was a simpler system, noting differential wheel RPM over a given threshold. No valve sensors or such. A friend's Renault Megane had the tyre PSI thing 20 years ago, and that gave him no end of grief. And now it's another MOT thing - if fitted - which seems fair enough to me.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Mac Doc - checked all driver and pax door functions, but I hear what you say...

 

[mac_doctor]

... I did get the test drive to know for sure I really needed an XJ in my life.

Fatal. The test drive has dragged many of us in, regardless of common sense.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Mac Doc... But for the siren call of leather and wood, we'd all be driving reliable, sensible, value, practical Skodas, like I've done for the past 22 years - until VAG turned bad with their despicable dieselgate corruption and worse. If only everything was as dependable as a VW!
https://www.theguardian.com/money/2021/sep/13/audi-sold-me-a-29000-duff-car-that-it-cant-fix

Then, the crisis hits - there comes a tipping point. For me, with no offspring, nor any friends, it first manifested as the £20k Bentley Conti as my Psych Meltdown Opulent Vehicle of Choice. But no, that's another VAG, so definitely not. Jaguar - now, what a pedigree - yet, almost sensible, as usual... It's the leather and silky smooth progression. And the possibility of a (distant) friend very occasionally, with legroom on the rear seat, something definitely lacking in a Bentley with huge maintenance bills.

Has anyone here come from Bentley to Jaguar, while I'm soon to be a Skoda / Jaguar combination?

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Here's my pre-purchase checklist. Perhaps this could be further developed into an even more useful generic document for everyone's benefit? Unless there's something similar about?

Jaguar XJ Inspection

Reg Date Seller
Address
Asking Price Phone
Email
Mileage
Last MOT advisories - (Check DVLA online)

Model Spec

Additional Spec

***********************************************************************************************************
Paperwork - V5 - check vin/ engine serial nos Dealer Warranty?
Service stamps
Service History Notes, invoices

Dates - Brake Discs, Pads, tyres, consumables

What's missing - water pump replaced?

Cam, Fuel Pump, and Aux Belts changed? (Dates)
************************************************************************************************************
Wheels Tyre Condition (£190 each) [ ] [ ] [ ] [ ] Matching brands across axles?
Alloy Condition (£100 each for refurb) [ ] [ ] [ ] [ ]
Brake disc condition (£70 each) [ ] [ ] [ ] [ ]
Wheel nut condition (£10 per wheel) [ ] [ ] [ ] [ ]
External bodywork Front Undersill kerb damage?
RH wing RH front door
RH rear door RH rear panel
Boot - Interior Spare tyre Tools
LH rear panel filler cap (broken connection, water drainage?) LH rear door
LH front door LH wing
Roof - (closed sunroofs) Windscreen damage?
Cabin - Upholstery and carpet condition
Engine bay sniff test oil filler cap opening before start - Diesel ingress? Aux belt condition (cambelt indicator, wouldn't replace cam and leave aux?
Coolant level Oil Leaks? Steering fluid leak?
Engine start - cold exhaust smoke Tone
Interior powered checks Driver window(s) and sunroof and blind function - (open, check for rust / water ingress around seals) Seat movement driver & pax, seat heaters / coolers Windscreen and screenwash Lights and indicators function test Mirror functions Reversing camera Air con front Air con rear pax
Pax window and sunroof function - (check for rust / water ingress around seals) Seat heater / cooler
************************************************************************************************************
Test Drive - Brakes even progression Even tracking / pull Gear change smooth
Warning lights Acceleration / lag Paddles Sport / dynamic mode
Rattles (doors), noises
************************************************************************************************************
Post Drive - Exhaust and Engine inspection
Music system - cd hdd dvd radio satnav

 

[mac_doctor]

My Checklist, for comparison:

TVs in the back? - check
Test Drive? - check

Take my money.

By luck there was a wheel on each corner and an engine.

 

[Bronco]

Welcome to the forum. Hopefully you've got a good one. My previous 3.0D Euro V gave me absolutely trouble-free motoring, no faults, no DPF issues, no door problems, the wheel nuts were fine, no electrical problems, no throttle body problems or MAP sensors, nothing, so don't be scared off by the doom/gloom stories on here - just enjoy it. And you know where to come for advice if you are unlucky enough to encounter any issues.

 

[WelshBoa]

I've just got visions of a mustard coloured XJ reading this thread.....

 

[mac_doctor]

I've just got visions of a mustard coloured XJ reading this thread.....

Don't be silly, XJs can't read.