[captain crappycrimp]

I'd be happy to pay XK8 engineering consultancy rates, but Captain Crappycrimp, sat opposite me here in Company HQ, now has his nose put out of joint and is all envious.

Not envious just being a Yorkshireman I dont agree with paying for advice given freely😎. Thanks for the tip, wondered why that torx screw was so prominent

That recent addition is the one that was on eBay - ha - no more competition!

I'm now the cheapest XK8 Convertible on there!!!



TMW

Please note we didnt pay the asking price😎

 

[captain crappycrimp]

Ha ha - you know he's still calling. Had a lovely trip down to the south today...

It's like Mr Creosote - just one waffer-thin XK8...???



TMW

And unfortunately I dont like Black ones and have refused to entertain any more XKs till one is finished.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

It's so good to have a Yorkshireman as Chief Negotiator.

 

[captain crappycrimp]

Shaguar has arrived at the Mustard and Crappycrimp home for aged and decrepit Jaguars. It was too hot and I was too tired to unload or park it neatly which will be a job for tomorrow

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

And unfortunately I dont like Black ones and have refused to entertain any more XKs till one is finished.

I used to like black cars - until recently. The constant Sahara dust deposits on Behemoth are getting a bit tedious, mind.

Sold would be even better than Finished, but now there is the room for four, as a max working stock level.

 

[captain crappycrimp]

Sold would be even better than Finished, but now there is the room for four, as a max working stock level.

You wont let me sell any of them so dont pretend you will.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

That recent addition is the one that was on eBay - ha - no more competition!

I'm now the cheapest XK8 Convertible on there!!!



TMW

 

[orsom weels]

Thanks for the tip, wondered why that torx screw was so prominent

Yes, I wondered why they stuck a Torx screw there, I couldn't think it was for it's decorative qualities
Then when leafing through the hand book, there's a picture with said screw shown as exhibit 'B', and then mention of Gear shift interlock manual override. Says you can use the key or 'similar shaped tool'

And unfortunately I dont like Black ones.

I used to like black cars - until recently. The constant Sahara dust deposits on Behemoth are getting a bit tedious, mind.

He he. Generally I love the look of a black car, but after having one many years ago, I vowed I'd never have another, as I seemed to be forever trying to keep it looking nice. Leave them to Mrs O!
Then when faced with an XK which in every other way ticked all my boxes, and did look lovely, all clean and shiny, I kind of forgot all about my previous vows .
I must confess to having questioned that decision once or twice after cleaning it ready to go somewhere, then having it look worse than when I'd started after a little shower of rain .
At least twice, everything has been left covered in a kind of sticky grey substance that has been quite hard to remove once dried on .

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Then when faced with an XK which in every other way ticked all my boxes, and did look lovely, all clean and shiny, I kind of forgot all about my previous vows .
I must confess to having questioned that decision once or twice after cleaning it ready to go somewhere, then having it look worse than when I'd started after a little shower of rain .
At least twice, everything has been left covered in a kind of sticky grey substance that has been quite hard to remove once dried on .

Vows? Hmm. Completely understandable, now burdened with a harem of curvaceous seductive high maintenance temptresses.

I suppose the fine sand will fall early Saturday morning, after getting Behemoth all sparkly for Gaydon. Might get turned away at the gate otherwise - For shame, Sir!

 

[orsom weels]

I suppose the fine sand will fall early Saturday morning, after getting Behemoth all sparkly for Gaydon. Might get turned away at the gate otherwise - For shame, Sir!

We're planning to go in Mrs O's new S type as it's a little more frugal on diesel than my S type or XK are on petrol, and the run will do it good. It's black though, so no acceptance of responsibility for it's appearance when it gets there.
All I will say is that it will be clean and sparkly Friday afternoon, it's booked in with the local car wash guys

 

[tmwsccsh]

P

He he. Generally I love the look of a black car, but after having one many years ago, I vowed I'd never have another, as I seemed to be forever trying to keep it looking nice. Leave them to Mrs O!
Then when faced with an XK which in every other way ticked all my boxes, and did look lovely, all clean and shiny, I kind of forgot all about my previous vows .

Prior to October 2020 I had 3x black cars at the same time - X, XK and Mustang. Nightmare keeping them all clean. Having said that, it's not much better now with the same fleet, just the X is now blue...

TMW

 

[orsom weels]

We've sort of got three at the mo, albeit one will soon be moving out. We have my XK, which despite saying 'Grey' on the V5, and the colour being called Anthracite, is definitely black, Mrs O's new S type, which again, is definitely black, but is called 'Midnight blue', and her old X type, which our daughter will be taking on as her entry into Jag ownership now it's surplus to requirements, the only one that's colour is actually called black!

OW

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

While I'm contemplating cleaning Behemoth this evening, for my jolly at Gaydon, my loyal serf Cap'n C has just sent me photos from the lockup, showing his robbing Shaguar of spark plugs and whatnot, to see if Immobile can be roused over at the garage, and saved from the dreaded Parting Out.

The tension mounts... He'll be back over here sometime to let us know how he got on.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

The lockup was found and grabbed with both hands on Monday.
Prior to that, Cap'n C had done due diligence, surveying other sites around Scarborough. One even had a fancy awning.
"We're asking £30k a year for this..."
Cap'n C replied that she actually said that, while keeping a straight face! End of that enquiry.

This will be the storage area, along with light working and valeting, after vehicles have been through the garage for major work. This means that the operation will now be slick - able to 'multitask' across both sites - or what used to be called doing two things at the same time.

 

[Ruby351]

The lockup was found and grabbed with both hands on Monday.
Prior to that, Cap'n C had done due diligence, surveying other sites around Scarborough. One even had a fancy awning.
"We're asking £30k a year for this..."
Cap'n C replied that she actually said that, while keeping a straight face! End of that enquiry.

This will be the storage area, along with light working and valeting, after vehicles have been through the garage for major work. This means that the operation will now be slick - able to 'multitask' across both sites - or what used to be called doing two things at the same time.

Lockup, Jags here there and every where, this is so exciting and what marvellous news to read these past few posts!

I knew you chaps had plans afoot by by gum, things are moving in leaps and bounds now, very enterprising and I'm chuffed to bits for you. Fantastic to start out on a new venture together, doing something you really enjoy and bring in other mates along the way to ... good on ya Phil and Cap'n C

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

We name all our cars, necessary for the multiple X100s, (and in time, Saabs) but also for the rest.

Kubelwagen (the BMW X5) and Happy Trails, the trailer, are on the Company fixed assets register (well, just a section of the spreadsheet).

(The original Wehrmacht Kubelwagen - Bucket Wagon)

Dolphin - an Astra which has been delayed over a held up by Berxit imported GM part - so much for being a Flipper...

Memsaab - a 9-3 convertible - Saabs being a Cap'n C specialism. Nearly ready, transformed from a tatty MOT failure into a stunner.

And CU Jimmy - a Range Rover bought from Scotland, and named for us by a Scots friend. This one turned out to have some wee problems, aye... the seller was a con artist - usually Cap'n C spots 'em... He has nearly overcome all the issues and without spending too much (preserving the potential profit) to put everything right.

The car is basically sound. Runs well, supremely comfortable, The dodgy b*****d was hiding lots of faults, he claims to have changed the battery but it looks like he spiked the battery damaging the LED display and Park distance control Unit, he then b/s'd me that the binnacle just needed recoding to the new battery, I checked and this is a common thing. In reality he had then taken the instrument binnacle out and filled the warning lights with black silicone instead of 30 mins on a diagnostic machine which would have cleared all the lights with a simple reset. Sadly the LED display is still out but I have not given up hope and will do the suggested long battery disconnect when the garage opens again, as it might need a diagnostics reset again. He had pulled the the PDC control plug as it was emitting a constant scream through the speakers. Kubel, which shares many of the same parts, has donated her PDC and all is now functioning (Kubel needs new sensors). He had also pulled a fuse on the air suspension as it had gone faulty with the spike to the battery - I've replaced the fuse and turned the wheels lock to lock restored functionality.
Currently the only remaining faults are the LED on the instrument binnacle and the non functioning CD Player, I hope the long battery disconnect will sort both if not a new binnacle will be required (between £30 and £100 on ebay I will be going for the cheaper seen working version) and Kubel will donate its working CD unit. A quick rub down of the bottom wheel arch and flash over by blue spray can, and the same on two wheels this time in Silver and she's ready to go on DaughterTrader. Frankly it's a lucky escape - so far fingers crossed, but I'm still annoyed with myself for getting fooled.

I know nothing about fixing cars... These photos strike fear into my heart, but the Captain is tackling the multiple problems systematically and is developing pragmatic solutions. OK, he was tricked that once, but recoveries like this are why he really does need to be working in the Motor Trade, to save the waste of all that talent.
Meanwhile, I'm slooowly learning the art of remotely assessing 'spares and repairs' cars on Ebay to spot potential projects to offer for the Captain's consideration.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Yesterday, we ordered four Revolvers from the internet.

Was later thinking that our discussions on that, picked up by the ever inquisitive Alexa, the Crappycrimp House Spy, might set off all sorts of alerts. Maybe a surprise visit from those fine upstanding chaps of the local Tactical Firearms Squad.

 

[Mean Mr Mustard]

Oh Lordy...

Another one found and bought, only seven miles away from Chateau Moutarde, and now named Marmite. On account of this respray colour.

The seller helpfully suggested we could corner the market by buying every X100. 😎😎 We've been rumbled.

 

[mbd424]

Oh Lordy...

Another one found and bought, only seven miles away from Chateau Moutarde, and now named Marmite. On account of this respray colour.

There is green mustard

green mustard sauce - Google Search

 

[orsom weels]

You really are beginning to live up to the thread title

How many do you have to give a home to before you can apply for charitable status? Sort of like the 'BIG Cats protection league'